? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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