I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
