i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
