i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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