I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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