haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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