Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
