CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
