This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I need water and some morals
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
