I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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