did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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