There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
