Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
this just has baby written all over it
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
