On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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