Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
The Olympian is in my bed
Randomize
