Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Oh god it's open bar.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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