Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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