Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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