idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
