There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
