So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
