At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
