hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
