Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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