Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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