marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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