You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
