you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Randomize
