Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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