I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I could make wine with my vomit
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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