two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
