she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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