i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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