i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
sick fucks of a feather flock together
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
