Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize