Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
