Banned from zoo.
Again?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
