the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
