Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Do vagina's smell?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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