He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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