Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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