Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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