the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
