well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
