One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Will exercising make me less horny?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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