sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
