Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
