Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
