we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
