I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
